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I am heading to Portland, Oregon, for a quick business trip. I have a meeting all day Saturday and will come home Sunday. I feel like I will spend more time on airplanes than i will spend awake in Portland.

This is my first time there and I'm excited to visit. Also, one of my former students -- who left our school in Colorado and transferred to a university in Portland -- is going to hang out with me. We've been talking online the last few months and it sounds like he's doing well -- I'm excited to see him and get to know him outside the classroom!

Stan came over last night for dinner and Lost. Then there was a new episode of South Park. We were going to follow that with a movie I'd gotten but Stan, being the mature one, said he should probably go home and let me go to bed, seeing as I had to get up at 5am to fly out. I'm glad he did, I kinda needed the sleep!

Labels: Teaching, Travel, Work

Yesterday I went back to the University of Virginia to present a guest lecture in a class. I went to UVA for my undergraduate education, of course, so going back there to teach -- even for just an hour -- is a big deal. UVA was the defining place in my life, an experience that created a new "me" and set me on the path to the great life I've enjoyed these last 20 years. Also, I did not have the best grades there, so teaching something is, shall we say, a little ironic.

I gave a class on combating terrorism. One interesting part of this is that the last time I spoke at UVA was back in November 2001, on the same topic. The 9/11 attacks had happened only a couple months earlier and my presentation focused on the likely US response. I had a chance last week to go back through my notes from that discussion and see which of the things i predicted came true and which ones I missed. Hmmmm, invasion of Iraq...didn't see THAT one coming.

It's kind of cool to go back and be welcomed by the students as something of a University success story, even though many of my classmates have done far greater things than I. I like that because, where I used to teach in Colorado, returning alumni were often met with a "so what?" attitude from the students. Here, they made me feel like I still belonged, and they looked up to me. And that was nice.

Adrian was in town that day, he is on a driving tour of the South this week, so we had lunch at a restaurant just outside the University grounds (Adrian is a graduate as well). It was a little disturbing to hear the "oldies" radio station in the restaurant playing music from my college years. Then again, maybe it wasn't an "oldies" station, maybe it just played music from the 80s. Because I'm still a little too young to have my music referred to as "oldies."

Labels: Teaching

As with all years past I'll take today to kind of wrap up there last 365 days. It's been a wild ride of a year...things I expected got shifted around, things I totally didn't expect popped up, and all in all one of the best things I can say about the year is that no one shot directly at me. Though the year isn't over for about another 8 hours, so we'll see.

There are some things I mentioned last December that I was going to do that, unfortunately, didn't get done. I was planning to upload all my journal archives from before the big Diary-X crash, but the external hard drive where they're stored has crapped out on me and I can't get them off of it. I need to buy another drive and have someone go in and get the data off the bad one to transfer to the new one, but so far I've been lazy and haven't done that. Another thing I'd hoped to do was work on my dissertation, finally turning it into a book I can publish. I think there are some good ideas in there (and someone must agree...my dissertation spends a lot of time checked out of the two libraries where it resides) and I need to get it out into a more mainstream forum before time passes me by. I got going on it in earnest toward the end of the year at work but then some other things came up that took precedence. However, I've got a schedule for finishing it and I guess I can just bump the schedule a couple months and get back on it, and then I'll be fine.

Some totally unexpected things came up this year and I guess I should expect the same in 2008. The biggest was that I went to Afghanistan for 2 months, in June and July, to train the faculty at a military school. This was my second war (though, unlike Iraq where I got shot at every day, this time I only heard gunfire but never had it directed at me) and I think I'm done with the whole "war" thing. Of course, I thought that after Iraq, too. My time there was interesting and I felt I did some good, so even though there were some hardships there, at least it was rewarding. I have to say, though, that it hardened my resolve to get far away from the government when I leave my job in 2009.

My job has been a big let down in some ways this year, though I have tried to find an upside. I realized by the end of last year that I wouldn't be doing the work I signed on to do. Since then I've found I don't have much to do at all...we are overstaffed in my office, and my boss has no concept of "leadership" so I haven't really been given a clearly defined job to do. I've been taking on tasks as they come in, which is not really my strength (I'm best at the "long range" stuff) so I've been bored. That, in fact, is a big reason I volunteered for Afghanistan. I talked over the problem with my bosses when I left, but in the 5 months since I returned, nothing much has changed. Rather than complaining to them about it, I looked around for a position in another agency, but finally decided instead to take advantage of the free time I have at work to work on projects for other organizations and also start doing some serious planning for my post-government future. I also managed to publish a chapter in a book about the war in Iraq, so that's cool.

That planning, which I talked about at the end of last year, has moved forward. 2007 was my year to figure out what I want to do next, 2008 is my year to get things in place for the transition, and 2009 is the year it all comes together. So far this year I've developed a number of job plans and looked at the costs and benefits of all of them, trying to come up with the best option. I have a pretty good business plan laid out for my own consulting firm, and I'm also looking into teaching possibilities in the DC area. I still have some things to learn about, like marketing and such, but overall I have a decent idea and I want to start making it happen next year, testing the waters a bit. My goals are to have interesting work taking advantage of skills and knowledge I have, a flexible schedule, travel, and good money. While I'm wishing, I'd also like a pony. But hey, if you don't try, you can never succeed.

The one advantage of work this year has been the opportunity for travel. I've been to Hawaii twice, once for work and once for a combination of work and vacation. I've visited San Francisco twice, as well as Dallas and Tampa, and a trip to Atlanta which was very short and pretty boring. I also made it to Chicago, where I gave a paper but also got out of the hotel, which I don't often do on business trips to that city. Adrian and I also took a non-work trip to Puerto Rico for a long weekend last spring, and we met friends in New York back in February, while I also had a solo trip there in October. The big trip for me, of course, was to Asia in September, partially funded by work but also using the 10 vacation days I still had to use by the first of October. That. Was. Amazing. I got a day in Bangkok, though Bom had to go out of town and I wasn't able to see him. It was my first visit to Vietnam, and I got to spend a few days in Hanoi. Then I was off to Kuala Lumpur for 5 days, which was so much fun I still smile when I think of it. Afterwards I had 3 days in Hong Kong, which was a great time, then I headed back home and went to work the following day. Needless to say, I was a tired pup for a week. A planned trip to the Philippines for work got called off, though I hope to go in the coming year. I also am planning to get back to Singapore and Malaysia this year -- I got a research grant for a policy study and need to do some interviews in both countries. I'll probably add some Bangkok and Hong Kong time to that trip. And there are some other professional possibilities that might take me back to the region next year, though if that doesn't work out, I'll probably take a vacation over there.

As always, the best part of traveling is seeing old friends and meeting new ones. January's trip to Dallas led me to meet Ken from Bangkok who's now in Miami...a completely random meetup in a club, neither of us realizing the other was in town, and never having met before...how weird is that? In March I met Paulo while dancing in San Francisco, and in November we got to meet up again and go to dinner and get to know each other more than a dance floor with loud music allows. My time in Afghanistan allowed me to meet some professional colleagues who are pretty cool, so that was nice. After returning I saw I'd gotten e-mails from a couple folks on Fridae and after chatting with them I later got to meet them, so yay for meeting Eddie in Malaysia (who has tuned into a very special friend, someone who has captured his own place in my heart) and later Tony in Hong Kong. Also in HK I got to meet Eric, whom I've known over a year online but hadn't met yet. Of course, the big group meetup was in Kuala Lumpur, where I got to meet David, Frankie, Sam, Daniel, Paul, Alex, Jason, Jason Jr, Janvier, Cheryl, Thaddes, and Adrien. And of course, there was William...if you ask me why two people form a a strong emotional connection, I couldn't say, but if you ask me if it exists, I'd say YES! Can't explain it but I feel a special bond to William, and I think it's more than just the name thing. heh heh And no, it's not a physical thing, so the skanks among you can quit worrying about that. The last trip of the year, to Honolulu, led me to meet Kester, who is also friends with a couple people I know in Singapore...small world! And of course, October's trip to NYC led me to meet Paul, a very special guy who e-mailed me pretty much every day I was in Afghanistan, which helped...another "Fridae friend" who has tuned into a very cool real world friend. I also had the pleasure of meeting Joel on that trip, who is as funny and insightful in real life as he is on his blog that I've read for over a year.

This was also a year for new friends right here at home. Danny and I have finally gotten to know each other after a brief meeting in 2006. I met Vu and Troy and have gravitated into their circle of friends. Dan from Baltimore is another great guy I've gotten to know. And of course, Linh and I met late in the year and already I feel a strong friendship growing. I'm a lucky man.

Some of my existing friendships grew stronger this year. Ethan and I have gotten closer...the fact that we now work 2 blocks from each other makes it easier to get together during the week, and that's very cool. I got to meet up with Fritz a few times this year, both here and in Hawaii. Justin and I have gotten to know each other better as well. I didn't get to see Allan in Singapore this year, which is a real shame 'cuz I miss him, but I'll see him in the new year. Same with Bom. A few of my friends have had a rough time of it...one suffered a loss midway through the year, other friends have had serious problems in their relationships...but I think everyone is strong enough to bounce back from these and move forward.

It's been important to me to meet new friends and reconnect with old ones. Friends have always been the most important thing to me, and I've lost a part of that. It's time to reclaim them, reclaim that fun, and I'm glad I am. I think finally getting active on Facebook has helped. heh heh

As for me? I'm doing well, I think. I got serious about taking care of myself earlier in the year and managed to lose 20 pounds while adding muscle...much of that came from being in Afghanistan, with body armor all the time and nothing to do but work out after finishing my job, and of course I don't recommend that for everyone. I'm pleased I've been able to stay in good shape, though I have faltered during the holidays and will get back into my routine this week. After a few years of some serious body issues I'm actually happy with how I look now and am determined to maintain it for both health and looks. I'm also registered to run in two races next spring. In the last year I've explored some new interests, done a bit of new reading, and made goals for myself that I've later achieved, so that's all good. I may not be thrilled about everything in my life...and I may be a very different person from my normal self...but I think I'm in a good place right now.

The reason I'm a different person, and the reason I'm not totally content with where I am in life, is simple: Adrian and I. At the end of last year he said he wanted to work on things and try to get back together, but it's been a roller-coaster year as far as that goes. I've been up a few times but down most of the time, and that's why I tell many of my new friends "I wish you'd met me before all this because I'm really a much better person than I seem right now." The situation has been so confusing, and so complicated...I think most friends have given up trying to understand it, which is OK since I don't understand it myself. After 16 months of being depressed about it one thing is clear: it needs to get resolved, and soon, so my life can move forward again.

But we have still had some fun...a couple parties at the condo, the trips to Puerto Rico and Hawaii. When I look at the balance sheet for the year, I have to say it comes out with a profit rather than a loss. And I have next year to look forward to: getting ready for my post-government career, maybe doing some teaching, possible finishing writing one book and starting another (need to get to work on those). I also intend to meet some online friends: DanielHenry in KL, Harper and Luke Elijah in Singapore, Huy in Australia, and of course, Azhan in Malaysia (I'll try to sneak you-know-who into my suitcase for you!). I also plan to finally meet derek in Singapore...so strange that I've met his friends and his boyfriend but haven't actually met him yet. I expect to spend some more time in New York, hanging out with Scooter and getting to know Paul better. I'm hoping to see Kester again in Honolulu, and visit some new places: Taiwan, maybe, or Vancouver. I'm scheduled to go to Portland for work, and San Francisco too...that should be fun. I have tickets to see My Fair Lady at the Kennedy Center (thank you Adrian!) and the Spice Girls with Linh. I want to see my KL brothers again. I need to spend some time with Eddie in Malaysia and get Allan to slow down long enough for a hug or two or twelve. I hope to see Bom again and will visit Thailand simply for that reason. I would like my friendships here to grow stronger...I want people to know I'm not always such a mess, I'm actually someone they can count on. The bottom line is, I want to be happier, and I want to make everyone around me happier.

But isn't that what all of us want?

Happy New Year, everybody.

Labels: Friends, Life, Questions, Relationships, Teaching, Travel, Wandering Mind, Work

I found my time in Afghanistan to be a pretty worthwhile experience, on the whole. I was there to spend two months with the social science faculty at a fairly new university. They already have courses up and running, so I wasn't really there to help with the curriculum. Instead I was teaching them how to teach, which was harder than it sounds. The younger faculty members were mostly recent college grads (a bachelor's degree was typically all they had) with no teaching experience, while the older instructors grew up in Soviet-style and Taliban-era educational systems. As is often the case, the younger guys have the motivation to change things for the better, while the older guys -- who are in charge -- are afraid of change and try to block new ideas. I pointed out that maybe the Soviet and Taliban systems weren't that good, seeing as the Soviet Union doesn't exist anymore and the Taliban were bastards. But yeah, I had my work cut out for me.

My goal wasn't to get them to teach American-style, but instead, get them to find an "Afghan style" that was right for them. We needed to find techniques that took into account the poor elementary and high school educations the students had, the relatively low level of education the instructors had, the expectations they have for graduates, and of course, the stresses of an ongoing war. So yeah, the teaching styles of the University of Virginia probably wouldn't work so well.

The work was interesting. I spent a lot of time observing classes and working one-on-one with the instructors. I taught a few seminars for the department and also taught a few economics and international relations classes. I was happy to see some of the instructors using the techniques we talked about, adapting them to their own needs. I also "adopted" one particular class of juniors and kept going back there. They were really bright and asked a lot of very insightful questions about US policies...I wish my students at my old university would have seemed so interested. They have some odd views of how things work in the world but at least they're open minded enough to ask questions and learn.

So, yeah, the work was good. And I noticed a big difference between this experience and my time in Iraq a couple years ago. In Iraq I worked at the Embassy and when i left I only said goodbye to Americans and other coalition partners...no Iraqis. But this time around, when I left I was saying goodbye to Afghans, and not so many Americans. Yeah, this was very different.

That was the upside. But I found a downside to Afghan culture. This sounds demeaning, but they seem like children. Children who want you to give them things, who act grown up when they aren't, who are capable of violence without realizing the effects of it, who want authority without responsibility. This is not a good thing. This country has been at war of one sort or another for 30 years and it cannot continue...we saw what happened the last time it descended into a totally failed state, and as one instructor told me, "you need us, you cannot afford to walk away again." Unfortunately, I think he's right. But I feel like they'll say what they think we want to hear, then as soon as we are gone, move on their own way. Which is fine, until their way doesn't work and they come back to us to fix it.

The younger generation has the desire to do great things and the passion -- for the moment -- to make positive changes. But many are getting frustrated and trying to leave the country. The brain drain is incredible, and the government is taking steps to slow it, but these steps are reducing the chance for overseas training. I hope some of them will stay and fight through the frustration, taking the baby steps that are needed to move the country forward.

The Dean told me they cannot measure themselves against the US, they must measure themselves against their neighbors. Good call. Unfortunately, we seem to be pushing them toward a US standard, all in the name of "setting the bar high so they have something to reach for." Considering how many people are living in mud huts without running water, we may need to rethink that strategy.

Labels: Teaching, Work

I've been helping my friend Eric with his master's thesis the last couple weeks. He's from Japan and is working on his M.A. in International Affairs. Anyway, he learned English really well just a couple years ago, but learned to speak it more than to write it. He speaks it very well but his writing was a little shaky so two weeks ago he called in a bit of a panic because a draft was due to his professor but he knew the English was poor. I took a couple days to read it (it's about 40 pages long) then spent two evenings going through it word for word with him. After the second night we went to dinner with a friend of his and he called me "Sensei," which I thought was incredibly cool. Then again, I tend to be impressed by the smaller things in life more than the bigger things.

He went on and made all the changes and we got together last night for one more read-through, just to make all the final fixes before he turns in the completed version this week. he has thanked me profusely, and even brought back a couple cute little gifts from his job interview trip to San Francisco last week, but hey, if he keeps calling me Sensei he doesn't have to thank me at all, 'cuz for whatever reason I really liked that.

Speaking of students, a couple weeks ago I forgot to mention that I met up with a very nice University of Texas professor and his charming partner and about a dozen of his students he'd brought to DC for a trip. He likes for them to meet political science degree holders who do something besides teach or go to law school so they can see they have other options. It was a very fun evening, in part because I really like students, and in part because some of them knew Karl-Thomas, who was a political science major there until he graduated in December. Small world.

Labels: Friends, Life, Teaching

I'll be in Afghanistan in June and July, so just two months, which is a lot better than my 4 months in Baghdad a couple years ago. I'll probably leave DC near the end of May and get back in early August because it takes a few days to get into and out of the country.

Basically, I will be mentoring the social science faculty at a school there...they have been in operation for a few years but need some help. The college in Colorado where I used to teach has teamed up with another US college to support this new Afghan school. My old college needed some help so I was asked if I'd be wiling to go during the summer. The subjects I'll be helping with are Economics, International Relations, and Government, though in this case it's Afghan Government, which means I should learn a little something about that.

This sounds like an opportunity to really do some good, and accomplish something that I can feel proud of. Education is the key to self governance, so maybe I can help this country just a little bit. I'm very excited, and sure, a little nervous, though at least I'll be better prepared for this than i was for Iraq. And it'll be good to get into a classroom again, though the language barrier will be a little trickier here than it was in Colorado, I think.

Labels: Life, Teaching, Travel